Warehouse 13 Artifact Database Wiki
Warehouse 13 Artifact Database Wiki
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Warehouse 13 Artifact Database Wiki
William Safire’s Apollo 11 Speech

Origin

William Safire

Type

Speech

Effects

Foresight of appropriate response for alternate scenarios

Downsides

Strands user somewhere prominent but unreachable

Activation

Silently reading and reciting aloud

Collected by

Warehouse 13

Section

Korolev-956K

Aisle

418426-1135

Shelf

400507-9507-213

Date of Collection

May 30, 2017

[Source]


Origin[]

William Safire originally started his career as an author and columnist at Sokolinki Park. After witnessing Vice President Nixon’s impromptu debate with Secretary Khrushchev in an American model kitchen, Safire decided he respected the man’s defense of American capitalism. He later joined the staff for Nixon’s presidential bids, writing alliterative and wordy speeches for campaigns. His most famous quote was for running mate Spiro Agnew, “nattering nabobs of negativism".

However, what many do not know is Safire also penned a top secret speech in case the Apollo 11 mission ended in disaster. It specifically addressed how the President was supposed to explain to the world how that the astronauts would be unable to make a return voyage.

Fate has ordained that the men who went to the moon to explore in peace will stay on the moon to rest in peace.
These brave men, Neil Armstrong and Edwin Aldrin, know that there is no hope for their recovery. But they also know that there is hope for mankind in their sacrifice.
These two men are laying down their lives in mankind's most noble goal: the search for truth and understanding.
They will be mourned by their families and friends; they will be mourned by their nation; they will be mourned by the people of the world; they will be mourned by a Mother Earth that dared send two of her sons into the unknown.
In their exploration, they stirred the people of the world to feel as one; in their sacrifice, they bind more tightly the brotherhood of man.
In ancient days, men looked at stars and saw their heroes in the constellations. In modern times, we do much the same, but our heroes are epic men of flesh and blood.

Although the contingency also planned on informing the families and providing them last rites, no need arose. It was kept secret until the 30th anniversary of the moon landing, when its text was published for all to read.

Effects[]

Reading increases the user’s preparedness for multiple event outcomes. They can clearly picture which scenarios are most likely to happen, regardless of the multitude of variables present. Also pictured will be the ideal plan and many possibilities of accidents and failure. With foretelling of those likely events, the user can begin to figure out which actions will lead them to success.

However, it has one serious downside. As the written event never occurred, the speech will try to recreate a variation of the events to fulfill its original purpose. Reading the text aloud to another person will result in the speaker being transported somewhere iconic but desolate. Detention centers, restricted monuments, even active volcanic ranges are known to have people just suddenly appear, without record or possibility of leaving.

Astronomy Artifacts
Astronomers Clyde W. Tombaugh's Photographic PlatesEdmond Halley's TelescopeErnst Chladni's PlateFritz Zwicky’s Meteor PelletsGalileo Galilei's AstrolabeHeinrich Wilhelm Matthias Olbers’ TelescopeJohannes Hevelius' QuadrantJohannes Kepler's Telescope LenseJohn Flamsteed's Star CatalogueKazimierz Kordylewski’s TelescopeLuis Alvarez's Iridium ChunkNicolaus Copernicus' Armillary SphereTycho Brahe's Prosthetic NosesVera Rubin's ProtractorWilliam Wales' Portable Observatory
Exploration Missions American Apollo 11 Lunar Landing Hoax SetApollo 13 Command ModuleApollo 15 Geologic Hammer and Falcon FeatherChris Hadfield's Acoustic GuitarColumbia Space ShuttleNavigational Software from the Mars Climate OrbiterPete Conrad's Space BootsRichard F. Gordon Jr's Spacesuit HelmetSaturn VThe Fourth AstronautWally Schirra’s Insignia PatchesWilliam Safire’s Apollo 11 Speech
Soviet / Russian Alexey Leonov's "Near the Moon"Laika's HarnessSputnik's AntennaUSSR Space CapsuleValentin Bondarenko's Cotton BallsValeri Polyakov's Blood Pressure CuffVladislav Volkov’s SpacesuitYuri Gagarin's Hockey PuckYuri Gagarin's SpacesuitYuri Gagarin's Lieutenant Pin
Other Edward Makuka Nkoloso’s Oil DrumMatroshka Experiments Mannequin
Natural Phenomenon Samples Chunk of the Chelyabinsk MeteorExplosive Meteor FragmentNWA 7034Piece of Halley's CometStar Jelly
Solar Prominence Donald Liebenberg's Eclipse GlassesÉvry Schatzman's TelescopeJohannes Fabricius' Camera ObscuraObelisk from St. Peter's BasilicaRa's ScepterRa's Solar Barge
Lunar Activity Chang'e's BuyaoJean Chastel's Silver GunLi Bai’s Rosewood Wall PanelsPrincess Kaguya’s Bamboo SwordSelene's TiaraTobias Mayer's Reflecting CircleWang Zhenyi's Lunar Eclipse
Exotic Physics Fred Hoyle’s Rubik's CubeGeorge Biddell Airy Transit InstrumentHermann Weyl's Drafting CompassHolmdel Horn AntennaJames Chadwick's Nobel PrizeJocelyn Bell Burnell's Chart RecorderJohannes Kepler's Planetary ModelJohn Archibald Wheeler’s Newton CradleKarl Schwarzchild's Pocket WatchLouis Essen's Alarm Clock
Extraterrestrial Life Purported Sightings Heaven's Gate HomepageJ. Allen Hynek's TelescopeWilliam Brazel's Cowboy Hat
Fictional Encounters Bolaji Badejo's BeretCybermen OutfitsDalek CostumesFox Mulder's 'I Want To Believe' PosterGarrett P. Serviss' Prop Martian GunGeorge Lucas' Original Prop LightsaberH. R. Giger's Mechanical PencilHAL 9000 PropOmnitrix ToyOrson Welles' MicrophoneRichard O'Brien's StockingsU.S. Air Force Space Probe No. 1Zathura
Miscellaneous Bill Kaysing's FeatherCarl Sagan's JacketCharles Fort’s Newspaper ClippingsConrad Haas’ NozzleHuitzilopochtli's Sacrificial BowlJack Parson's Rocket EngineLance Bass' Cargo ContainerMaria Margaretha Kirch's EphemerisPiece of the Antikythera MechanismQian Xuesen's Servomechanism
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