| Lovely Bunch of Coconuts | |
|---|---|
| |
| "We used to have more of them until Mr. MacPherson got a hold of Simo Häyhä's Rifle."
- Mrs. Frederic | |
|
Origin |
Unknown |
|
Type |
Coconuts |
|
Effects |
Maintains position and orientation |
|
Downsides |
Causes growing rage in those that try to down them |
|
Activation |
Constant |
|
Collected by |
|
|
Section |
|
|
Aisle |
-- |
|
Shelf |
-- |
|
Date of Collection |
June 6, 1976 |
| [Source] | |
Origin[]
These coconuts seem to have no definitive origin, but based on their effects, it is likely they came from a carnival coconut shy.
Effects[]
These eight seven coconuts are always in a neat upright row (unless neutralized), attracted to each other by uncertain means. When lined up, they cannot be moved by any means and any attempt invariably results in the subject flying into a manic tantrum.
The coconuts will adhere to the effects of gravity, though they themselves never change orientation and cannot be moved from their position by human effort, direct or indirect. Throwing objects, pushing them and exposing them to intense wind have all failed to get them to shift. This effect "bleeds" somewhat into whatever is supporting them, making the eight seven wooden posts they're currently resting on likewise immobile.
The only known way to move a coconut is to place it in contact with a single penny, at which point it suddenly regains the mass and weight of an ordinary coconut of its size.
This artifact was accidentally activated by James MacPherson during his tenure as Warehouse agent. In a fit of rage, he used Simo Häyhä's Rifle against the coconuts, destroying at least one.
Felix's Notes[]
"Interesting potential applications here.
Test involved a human (Agent Donovan) holding a coconut in contact with a penny, then allowing the penny to fall away. Hypothesis was proven partially correct. Agent Donovan became a conduit for the coconut's bleeding effect and became unable to move her feet. Her hands were likewise locked into position around the coconut, which remained fixed in a single spacial point. Effect was similar to, as Agent Sordens put it, what a chicken does with its head.
Agent Dovovan was pushed, exposed to high winds, and had the floor beneath her tilted, resulting in no change in orientation of the coconut. Penny was reapplied and Agent Donovan's motor functions resumed. Coconut returned to its designated pedestal with no incident. Further testing in mobile vehicles remains to be approved."